Non Violent Communication for Neuroatypical
Nonviolent communication for nueroatypical
Overall, similar ways of communication. Protocols very useful for communication.
I feel statements...can be problematic, sometimes
"I've never experienced that state so they are lying..." "That's not valid because I have not experienced that..."
Refer to : Nonviolent Communication
1. Lots of Specificity
Explicit is better than implicit.
Conversational fillers are problematic.
- "It's ok" "Well, what's ok?"
- "I understand"
Rather, be specific about that it is, more explicit
- "It's ok you are upset."
2. Use of analogy
"sometimes I do not have the word to describe how i feel. i have lots of feelings."
describing situations might be better
"I feel the way I would feel if you killed my cat"
3. "I think we derailed" for off topic, be direct
"I think we derailed"
Popping the stack.
And, then bring back to topic.
Be explicit and direct.
Other ways of thinking about communicating emotions:
Emotions are not rational, but they can be predictive.
- Yet, the layer of words is important to describe them.
One can reverse engineer what other people are feeling by replaying events.
- And, can respond with "This sounds like how I felt when..." rather than, "I understand that feeling..."
4. Latency in response
Cognitive load to think about what you say
- Failure mode from latency --> Cannot usually get a word in
Tricks: Learn where to pause in order to keep the floor
Using hand signals to signify stop, slow, or other major moments in conversation for NVC. Symbols for:
- Explain in words
- Time out symbol
- I need time
"Take everything I say exactly at face value."
- Internet is a place where more level playing field, listen to my words
5. Smaller segments of conversation to achieve things.
What is the minimal segment? If you are trying self correctment, what is the smaller segment you can use rather than go off...
Other talking points:
- Excitment can be confused as anger.
- Affective vs. cognitive empathy (Important distinction)
- Also, there is potential space to talk about the breakdown of the perception of nueroatypical.
- Major point of difference, "Is your brain fucking with you?"
- Letting steam off physically
- Stare @ eyebrows etc. for eye contact